Further, Faster
8.16.21
C. Derick Miller
Head Writer
Your Stories On Video
I remember those lonely, early mornings in Army boot camp where I was working out and throwing up at the same time. Ok, I never said they were good memories, but memories, nonetheless. I knew that the further I ran, the faster I got, and the better I became at everything, I would get to go home for the holidays and see my family. At the time, I’d never been far away from them, and it was killing me. So, I did. I ran further, got faster, and became better at everything. Unfortunately, that better person I discovered was a loner and never cared much for family after that. Military reprograming is strange. You never know who you’ll turn into until the change occurs. I never truly went home again.
Twenty years later, I’m trying to change everything the military turned me into. I can’t run anymore because of military injuries but cycling has become my new passion. Less pressure on those knees of mine! I’m working out harder, faster, and going further with each passing week. The goal is not the same as the original, but similar. I have a new family and my wife is much younger than I am. This time, I fear that I’ll leave her far behind on this planet because of the way I’ve let myself go over the last couple of decades. Therefore, I do what I do. The thought of her being alone is excruciating. I always hoped I’d pass on before my partner, so they’d never have to endure such sorrow (or pleasure depending on how we are getting along at the end). With our huge age gap, the odds are not in my favor, and I’d never intentionally do anything to hurt her.
So, I ride. I ride my ever loving, ever shrinking butt off because, every fitness goal I reach is another chunk of time I’ll hopefully get to spend with her. Now, there are always those strange occurrences when life just slaps you down and drags you to your demise unexpectedly no matter what you do to prevent it. You can’t predict those, so they don’t count. If it’s up to me, I’ll be standing by her side (secretly in pain from my military knee injuries) until she’s an older lady herself. Who knows, maybe she’ll still be young enough to move on and accomplish great things? Maybe start a new life with a better, richer, more successful fellow who will buy her Alaskan cruises and wrapped candies. I jest, of course, because she’ll never find anyone better than me! Writers are the best you can get. At least, when we lie, it’s an entertaining story!
I bring this whole thing up in my blog because I had a client recently who chose not to get remarried after her husband passed away. Her reason? She wanted to go off and do all the things she wanted to do before she got married and started a family. After her husband passed away, she began a successful life in politics and as an educator. It was almost like her time spent with her husband was occupied by the duties of a family and nothing more. Everything she ever wanted to be was put on the back burner until he passed on. She loved him the way a wife should love a husband until the very end, and then began to live all the dreams she’d had while tending to his needs, changing diapers, and saving for her children’s’ colleges.
I think our parent’s hopes and dreams revolve around us, as children, doing the right thing and getting our education and career in order before diving into the family life. Well, hope in one hand a spit in the other, because most of our parents did it in reverse as well! That’s how I ended up in the Army to begin with. I already had two children and a divorce under my belt and wanted to do something extreme to change the ultimate outcome of my life. So, I signed my life away and became somebody. Somebody that the old Chad would no longer recognize. After that, I continued to evolve. Chad Miller became Private Miller became C. Derick Miller became Chad Cloud-Miller. Luckily, I am the last two of those identities at the same time and can turn them on and off at will. One of them is a crazed writer, and the other is a loving husband. It’s like Batman/Bruce Wayne, but with less expensive toys.
Was there something you always wanted to do but never quite got around to it? A regret, or a sigh of relief? Were there things that happened in your life that prolonged the accomplishment of your dreams? Did you ever get around to reaching for them? Are you still determined to make it all happen? Here at Your Stories On Video, we want to know, and so does your family & generations to come! Granted, you might want to potentially skip that part when you reveal your family as the cause of you never pursuing your dreams, but, no worries, I’ll word it all for you in such a way that they’ll never understand what you meant! I’m a writer, after all. We do that!
Me? Well, I guess it’s only fair that I lay all my cards on the table if I’m asking you to do the same. Did I achieve my goals? Not yet. Not all the way, but…I go a little further, faster every day. My children have all grown up and I am a professional writer. As far as fiction goes, I’m not famous, but my pen name is known all over the world. I may be the worst writer some of those readers ever read, but they know my name! I live in a trendy little neighborhood in a big city and trying harder everyday to be the best ‘me’ I can be. I stumble every now and then, but I have a great wife who never hesitates to help me up. A wife who, no matter how much younger she is than me, can’t keep up with me on a bicycle!
I promise to be that nagging old man barely clinging to life she always dreamed of…
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